The abundance of these posts with multiple dates is getting out of hand. In my defence I’ve been rather sick, in which I still am coughing my brains out. The days have blended together. I’ve felt extremely fatigued all week and I assume this will carry until I go home for the holiday. More and more things feel like an utter chore and I hate it. I hate thinking about my social interactions as they’re stretched thinner and thinner. My relationships are fading and there’s nothing I can do about it. Months will no doubt go by where I feel increasingly lonely and I dread it. I’m quite high maintenance but I keep my needs to myself. I want to make friends but no opportunities rear their heads and I can’t make my own opportunities. I’m terrified of going to people. I feel like I’ll be lonely forever, I can’t imagine that I’ll feel fulfilled with friendships like all of my peers no doubt are. I hate my life. My state of mind is a slow and painful death. My fate is to fade into an empty chasm of loneliness, even deeper than I am now. I need help but I don’t know where to find it. No one wants to like me. No one wants someone like me and so I’m stuck with this curse. The curse of loneliness.